If you have never done it, you might think business travel is glamorous. Maybe you're envious of those of us jetting off to Orlando or Dallas or Las Vegas or Des Moines. But if you really understood what it’s like, you might be content to stay home.

I just completed five travel weeks in a row. I’ve been to Orlando and Melbourne, FL, Nashville, TN, Dallas, TX, Charlotte, NC, local visits in the DC/MD/VA area, and Patuxent River, MD.

Sounds awesome, right? Just look at that picture of the beach! I didn't take that on a business trip, I can assure you.

Mostly, my view is of airports and airplanes and hotel rooms and convention centers. I walk for miles, sit for hours on planes and in meetings, and try to sleep on strange beds where the pillows are all wrong.

A fish bowl

Someone compared it to being inside a fish bowl, where you look through the glass at the world around you, but you can’t touch it.  I ride past interesting views and signs for cool things to do, but there is no time to really take in a city. At best you get a few hours at night to try to find a decent restaurant within your per diem range, before you return to the hotel to catch up on emails before bed.

Putting on your “this is fun” face

A few weeks ago in Dallas there was a “Mix” event at Gilley’s put on by one of the sponsors. All these businessmen and a few women donned sparkly blinking cowboy hats and learned line dancing or sang karaoke. It’s very strange “partying” with colleagues and customers. (See Women Traveling with Men) Our group adopted a lone woman for a while who couldn’t find her colleagues, because the only thing worse than partying with work friends is being at a huge party by yourself. It mostly looked like people were gamely trying to seem like they were having fun while staring at their phones.

I would have much preferred being on my couch at home with my dog in my lap.

Business Travel Hassles

At the end of a long week, I can hardly wait to board the plane for the flight home. But afternoon flights in the south in the spring are asking for trouble. Thunderstorms. I sat on the plane presumably heading home from Dallas, as we taxied out to the runway, then sat there.

“This is your captain speaking. Because of storms, we are going to need to fly west, then north, then east to get you to Washington. We have two choices: We could bring on enough fuel to make it all the way, but that would require us to kick off six passengers.”

The pilot on this United flight paused while we took that in, then laughed. “Of course, we won’t be doing that. Our other option is to stop halfway there to refuel.”

A groan went up from the cabin, as we contemplated how much after midnight this would get us home. So we waited.

“This is your captain again. We are going to need to get more fuel before we take off, and need to go back to the gate. But unfortunately, our steering is not working, and we are going to have to wait for a tow back to the gate. Then we get engineering to come fix the steering while we are refueling.”

There was a feeling of camaraderie aboard, as we waited for them to fix and refuel our crippled plane. I’m not quite sure why we didn’t all just get off and try our luck elsewhere. One woman went to the front and demanded snacks for all of us, and came down the aisle with a tray of energy bars and later chips. Another woman passed around sandwiches – not sure if they were from her personal supply. Passengers who would normally ignore each other for the flight home were chatting easily as we awaited our fate.

Would we get home that night, or sleep in the airport?

We made it back, sometime after midnight, six and a half hours after boarding the plane. Apparently the pilot decided to skip the detour, because it was the bumpiest ride I have ever been on. And that includes wooden roller coasters.

Are you still envious of my “glamorous” traveling life?